How To Be A Good Christian

Now that I got you here with my beautiful click-bait title that I would only assume would land me with a dope desk at Buzzfeed's head quarters I'd like to talk to you about grace. But don't worry non christians this one is more about the grace we show each other as humans.

We were sitting in the front seat of a car in the middle of a car wash. In the midst of a, more than likely, long day as car detailers for a dealership. Then I said the "Fuck" word. After a beat my co-worker turned to me and asked how, as a christian, am I allowed to curse.

We hated this job, well at least I did, and it wasn't uncommon for us to incessantly complain throughout our work days. I assumed I was just doing my part to grow our archive of chief complaints at the point in which I said this, but it's also not an uncommon thing for me to curse. Because of this I was confused by his response. Seemingly out of the blue he was perplexed by the pairing of my faith and my laissez faire relationship with the english language. And I was mortified that something that I saw as so minuscule was a black mark against my life as a christian.

(Still to this day I don't see cursing as a sin. However, that is not what this post is about. If you want me to explain my views on the issue let me know and I would be happy to and you can let me know how off base I am. But then again I've never really had much feed back on these blogs outside of my friends so if you're feeling frisky let me know.)

This left a bad taste in my mouth. Part of me was upset at myself that my life wasn't a good example of Jesus and that I drove away a man who didn't really know God. The other part was upset that this person thought I wasn't a Christian just because I said a word that the world has deemed as bad. A word Jesus's day and age had yet to hear. This was over six years ago and still sticks in the back of my head.

Six years ago and you're still dwelling on it? Yes, tiny man I picture in my head that argues with me. Something has been weighing heavy on my life over the past few months. I have made a lot of mistakes over my life time. Some the whole world could see, if it was paying attention. And some only one other person could see. And some in which I rode solo.

Everyone makes mistakes though right? It should be something that people understand. A folly, a misstep, a slight against another person. These are easily understood and each of us makes them. There should be compassion, there should be grace. However, we choose to tear each other apart for anything big and small.

To be vulnerable with you guys really quick I'll tell you that one of my biggest issues of life is women. And this has turned out to be the group of people that I inflict the most damage upon. Rooting from my indefinite loneliness and my fear of commitment I have strung girls along and ended up hurting them when my sober, unclouded mind took in the whole situation. I tell you this not to brag that I get a lot of girls and I'm so awesome that I obviously end up hurting them. But I tell you this to show you that I have been pretty awful to many people, but that does not make me an awful person.

My actions in these situations were fueled out of a place of brokenness. A place that I think we all have. Whether it's loneliness like mine is, or some other area that can take over your mind, we can become clouded and therefore make decisions that we will wholly regret soon after.

In the Christian faith the way a soul is saved is by accepting Christ into your life and accepting what him dying on the cross really represented. His death and resurrection was the ultimate act of Grace. The human race took the gift of life and earth for granted and their everyday actions spat in the face of what God wanted for them. Until finally God relieved us from the ultimate consequence of our transgressions. Every day we are forgiven and shown Grace for the awful things we do in this world.

No one you know is perfect. You're not perfect. Just because some one is in a position you see as powerful doesn't make them perfect. And no one should be held to that. I'm sure many of you know this but just because someone is a Christian does not make them a perfect or even good person. All of these people are just as messed up as you and me.

This is not a call to give Christians a pass on being shitty people. And it's not a call to give the everyday person a pass on being shitty people. It's more a call on understanding that no one is perfect and that we're all going to make mistakes and treat people poorly. I'm asking you to take a step back and look at the situation and attempt to visualize yourself in their space and try to get a context with what may have made them do the things that they did. Only then can we move forward in life without malice and contempt towards your neighbors. To free yourself from that burden is such a lightening action. Life without grudges is a life that isn't weighing you down. Please go out and live and mess up everyday. Forgive yourself and forgive others.

"Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed..."
- James 5: 16 (NIV)

Thank you and God Bless.